Hello fellow choosers of joy!
Fall has been awesome, and in California, there is an Indian summer, that bathes you in sun, as the changes of the leaves, and garden, take their place in the order of the seasons. This month has already given us a full moon and eclipse, and a Mercury Retrograde to boot! The retrograde time is always one of slowing down a bit, to re-group, rewrite, review, and reboot. While it can cause havoc with technology, communications, and travel, it offers us a chance to slow down, and make sure we really heard what the other person said, or make sure we were heard correctly. So many wars get started, feelings hurt, minds changed, because they heard something incorrectly! Include yourself in that group, and let's talk about forgiveness.
When I am at a crossroad, I choose forgiveness. The crossroad is in my mind, about how I should think of things, which category I should put this person into.
Of course, I can let myself take the critical judgement or thought, and run with it; allowing my mind to take some perceived slight, perceived stance, as the solid stone truth, but eventually the garden in my mind becomes a graveyard of judgements of perceived hurts, and subsequent decisions about those people, and situations. They can become tombstones, dead end paths. You will always have a file folder on that person, and you will judge them, and communicate with them, and think about them, accordingly.
I choose forgiveness mostly because I am lazy. I will have less to think about later. And while I am a Virgo, and LOVE to have things in organized files and piles, I feel so much freer being in present time with someone, and enjoying the moment, in all it's richness. There is simply too much stress when you do not forgive, too much clutter. Much of the time it is yourself that you need to forgive, for being so petty, so contracted, so sensitive, that you imprinted meaning when there was none. It's good and healthy to explore all your feelings that come up, including anger, fear, suspicion, sadness. They teach you about yourself, and help you create healthy boundaries. It is important for them to be heard, acknowledged, and sometimes, expressed directly. You may discover it was something else in your past, which caused your upset, not the present moment, and there is a golden opportunity for you to heal yourself, and release the past wounding. But be aware also that you are not your feelings, and you are not your thoughts, and you are not your mind, but the gentle awareness behind them. That is you. Forgiveness transmutes some of the emotions, forgiveness can help you look at things from another point of view, it can give you more space for peace to enter, for answers , and for change. Change happens right at that moment. It may be a process, to forgive some things; you may need to keep reminding yourself that you chose that road, at the crossroad. It is a great time to communicate with that person, without the charge, and understanding can occur. Or not. Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't! Forgiveness is a gift you invariably give to yourself.
Of course this doesn't mean not to be aware, or not to make changes. It may mean you take a time out from a friendship, or quit a job, or fire someone. It could also mean that you regroup, and then give them a second chance, with different boundaries. Or forgive, and give yourself a second chance.
When you decide to forgive someone, it starts a whole domino effect, the end result being more freedom, less stress, and a higher vibration. Your entire immune system, (including your T-cells), gets a huge boost, when your vibration changes to forgiveness. Laughing at yourself, at the stuck situation, having a good belly laugh, can be just the medicine you need. Then you can take the other path. It's more receptive, open, and allows for change softly. Travel lightly.
~Helena Mazzariello
Fall has been awesome, and in California, there is an Indian summer, that bathes you in sun, as the changes of the leaves, and garden, take their place in the order of the seasons. This month has already given us a full moon and eclipse, and a Mercury Retrograde to boot! The retrograde time is always one of slowing down a bit, to re-group, rewrite, review, and reboot. While it can cause havoc with technology, communications, and travel, it offers us a chance to slow down, and make sure we really heard what the other person said, or make sure we were heard correctly. So many wars get started, feelings hurt, minds changed, because they heard something incorrectly! Include yourself in that group, and let's talk about forgiveness.
When I am at a crossroad, I choose forgiveness. The crossroad is in my mind, about how I should think of things, which category I should put this person into.
Of course, I can let myself take the critical judgement or thought, and run with it; allowing my mind to take some perceived slight, perceived stance, as the solid stone truth, but eventually the garden in my mind becomes a graveyard of judgements of perceived hurts, and subsequent decisions about those people, and situations. They can become tombstones, dead end paths. You will always have a file folder on that person, and you will judge them, and communicate with them, and think about them, accordingly.
I choose forgiveness mostly because I am lazy. I will have less to think about later. And while I am a Virgo, and LOVE to have things in organized files and piles, I feel so much freer being in present time with someone, and enjoying the moment, in all it's richness. There is simply too much stress when you do not forgive, too much clutter. Much of the time it is yourself that you need to forgive, for being so petty, so contracted, so sensitive, that you imprinted meaning when there was none. It's good and healthy to explore all your feelings that come up, including anger, fear, suspicion, sadness. They teach you about yourself, and help you create healthy boundaries. It is important for them to be heard, acknowledged, and sometimes, expressed directly. You may discover it was something else in your past, which caused your upset, not the present moment, and there is a golden opportunity for you to heal yourself, and release the past wounding. But be aware also that you are not your feelings, and you are not your thoughts, and you are not your mind, but the gentle awareness behind them. That is you. Forgiveness transmutes some of the emotions, forgiveness can help you look at things from another point of view, it can give you more space for peace to enter, for answers , and for change. Change happens right at that moment. It may be a process, to forgive some things; you may need to keep reminding yourself that you chose that road, at the crossroad. It is a great time to communicate with that person, without the charge, and understanding can occur. Or not. Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't! Forgiveness is a gift you invariably give to yourself.
Of course this doesn't mean not to be aware, or not to make changes. It may mean you take a time out from a friendship, or quit a job, or fire someone. It could also mean that you regroup, and then give them a second chance, with different boundaries. Or forgive, and give yourself a second chance.
When you decide to forgive someone, it starts a whole domino effect, the end result being more freedom, less stress, and a higher vibration. Your entire immune system, (including your T-cells), gets a huge boost, when your vibration changes to forgiveness. Laughing at yourself, at the stuck situation, having a good belly laugh, can be just the medicine you need. Then you can take the other path. It's more receptive, open, and allows for change softly. Travel lightly.
~Helena Mazzariello
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